Nice Cocks

I like to think of myself as a defender of the Weak and Put-Upon things in this world. No one, I feel, has done more to make the Weak and Put-Upon feel patronised than me. I will always, if I can, stick my huge face in where it is not needed, my overlarge bulbous eyes bulging at the injustices and wrongs I encounter on my journeys.

One such incident presented itself as I was travelling down Locksbrook Road in Bath early one morning towards work. Ahead of me, as I sped along on my £2500 super bicycle, I could see a large group of men, all standing around the back of an opened Removal Lorry. Their attention though was not on the possessions of their client that they were ramming into the truck with all the vigour of and finesse of a bunch of apes jamming bananas into their faces, but on an object walking on the other-side of the road.

A woman.

LOCATION OF MY SUPERHERO-STYLE WOMAN DEFENDING

Their heads all turned in robotic unison as she walked by. Their lustful eyes following her like stalkers ignoring their restraining order. I felt my rage rising in me like a red tide of horror and rage. I should do something, I should do something to protect the honour of this poor, helpless weak woman, the way only a Man can.

"Hey! Nice cocks!" I shouted at the Removal Monkeys as I rapidly approached.

They turned to me and one of them, with a mixed look of surprise, pride and bashful pleasure on his face said, "Er, thanks!" in a genuinely pleased way.
I rode on, safe in the knowledge that I had safely made the streets a safer place where feeble women can safely walk about showing their sexy bits in safety.


PHHHWOOOOOOAAAAAR!

I hadn't notice before how nice that Removal Ape's legs were. Mmmmm, calves.