I am meant to wear glasses due to my eye lenses being all inconvenient shapes, but due to the outrageous speeds I reach on my top-of-the-line future bike they are in danger of falling off every 4 seconds. So my eyes go sky-clad, open to attack from flies, killer bees and Crusty Children. This all means my eyesight is a little distorted and I have to squint like Clint Eastwood if I want to see any details. Facial recognition is also greatly impaired, so hence my game.
As a Person Jogging, or a Person Walking a Dog, or even another Person on a Bicycle comes towards me I squint at them very hard, my jaw jutting out like an offensive weapon, my eyes staring into their worried and frightened face as I try and guess what Celebrity they are, or vaguely look like.
During this game Stars who have appeared in my eyes have been many, such as Dame Judi Dench, Sir Daniel Radcliffe and Lord 007 of the Sith Daniel Craig. The Dench is one hell of a Person Jogging, she pounds along scowling, and always puts in an extra burst of speed when she sees me coming, I guess to impress me. Radcliffe, star of those films about a mental magic boy, is very friendly though and always gurgles a merry hallo as he dodges out of the way due to me trying to get a close look. I do keep my distance from Craig though, because I've seen him in a film where he shot someone and played some cards and he was all ripped to the MAX and stuff as he was coming out of the sea in his speedos and I reckon he could handle himself even though he is only 3 foot 7 inches tall.
 |
| Hey! Ain't you that guy?! You know the one who has that stupid Blog? |
No comments:
Post a Comment