Black Ice

I pulled over on a little lane this morning to let a person driving a car overtake me, I then saw she was on he phone with her spoilt private school tosser child gawping at me and they didn't even thank me so I followed after them and blew the rear of their vehicle my customary raspberry and then went to turn off the lane up into Monkton Combe private tosser school and I skidded on black ice that I didn't see and then l rolled all over the lane.

As I lay there on my back, very still, I looked up into the cold blue sky and thought how beautiful it looked, the trees branches all reaching above me, a lone birdy flip flapping about. I then heard an approaching person in a car and they impatiently bibbed their horn at me. Turning my head to one side I could see it was the Mercedes driving poshie coming back after dropping her tossy child at it's tossy school. I twiddled my toes, I twiddled my fingers. Good, I thought, no spinal damage. 

She beeped again. 

I got to my feet and pulled myself and my twisted super bicycle out her way.

She drove past me again without thanking me.

I tried to blow another raspberry at her but I just dribbled on my quivering chin.